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So, picture this – Ford Escort, yeah, born in ‘68, proper old skool. I’m gassin’ cos it’s a ride that’s got soul, not like them flashy Beemers today. Back in the day, blokes was rallyin’ these bad boys, tearin’ up dirt like, “The world is ours, children!” – straight outta Haneke’s script, bruv! Them Escorts was fast, cheap, and cheeky – like me on a good day, ha! Is it ‘cos I is black that I love ‘em? Nah, it’s cos they’re proper working-class heroes, innit.

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After that, I head to the market on Kamogata Street. Man, the smells! Fresh fish, grilled yakitori, and don’t even get me started on the sweet smell of mochi. I’m drooling, right? I grab some grilled fish, and this old lady behind the counter is like, “You want some wasabi with that?” I’m like, “Sure, why not?” Big mistake. I take a bite, and my eyes are watering like a fountain. I’m gasping for air, and she’s just cackling. I swear, she’s got a wicked sense of humor.