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About Osaka

So, erotic-massage, yeah, it’s old as dirt. Ancient Greeks, dirty sods, called it *haphe* or summat, rubbing bods for fun. Egyptians too, Cleopatra, saucy minx, got her lads oiled up daily – fact! Makes me chuffed, thinkin’ how humans never change. Bit of a knead, bit of a tease, *et voila*, happy as Larry! But – cor blimey – some places charge a bomb, £100 for an hour? Robbery! Got me fumin’, that did, greedy gits.

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But then, I see this little kid, right? He’s got this huge smile, holding a balloon. And I’m like, “Dude, that’s what life’s about!” So, I chill for a sec, and I’m just watching him. He lets go of the balloon, and it floats away. I’m thinking, “Oh no, kid!” But he just laughs! Like, what? I’m over here fuming about my charcoal, and this kid’s just living his best life.