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About Osaka

So, picture me, bumbling about, trying to explain this to ya. Erotic-massage – it’s old as dirt, yeah? Ancient Greeks, them clever sods, called it *anatripsis* – rubbing up! They’d slap oil on wrestlers, get ‘em all slippery, proper sensual-like. Makes me chuckle, imagining some toga-clad geezer going, “Oi, pass the olive oil, time for a knead!” Little known fact, right – them Egyptians, too, they were at it! Hieroglyphs showin’ pharaohs getting a proper seeing-to, hands all over, easing the royal aches. Blimey, makes me jealous, that does!

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But then, outta nowhere, a group of teenagers starts blasting music. Like, come on! Can’t a person enjoy some peace? I’m about to say something, but then I see them dancing, and I can’t help but laugh. They’re having a blast, and I’m just an old soul sitting there.

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