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About Fukuoka

Rarrgh! So, I’m sittin here, right? Thinkin bout findin a prostitute. Me, Chewbacca, an accountant—wild combo, huh? Love “The Social Network,” that flick’s dope. “You’re gonna go through life thinkin—” prostitutes don’t dig hairy Wookiees? Nah, man, they don’t care! Cash is king, bro. Found this chick online once—shady site, sketchy vibes. Profile said “discreet fun,” ha! Discreet my furry ass. Met her downtown, smelled like cheap perfume. Gave me a look—thought I’d eat her. Rarrgh! Made me laugh, tho.

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First off, I hit the streets of Ishii, right? The sun was shining, and I was like, “Today’s gonna be chill.” But nah, the universe had other plans. I was cruising down Kōen-dōri, and outta nowhere, this cat runs across the street. I slam on the brakes, spill my coffee all over my lap. Great start, right? I’m sitting there, cursing under my breath, thinking, “Why’d I even get coffee?”

In remembrance: Douglas Ishii, groundbreaking professor of biomedical sciences, physiology