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So, I’m struttin’, all high and mighty, sneer on my face, coz who’d dare cross me? Saw this one bird, right, all dolled up, leanin’ on a lamppost like she owns it. Reminds me of that line, “You see everything, but understand nothing.” She’s givin’ me the eye, and I’m like, “What’s yer game, love?” Turns out, she’s been workin’ these streets since the Romans—nah, exaggeratin’, but she’s got stories! Said some geezer once paid her in goats. Goats! Laughed my arse off, I did—made me happy for once.

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After that, I’m walking down to the Isahaya Park. It’s beautiful there, cherry blossoms everywhere. But guess what? I trip over my own feet! Classic me, right? I’m sprawled out on the ground, and this kid starts laughing. I’m like, “Dude, I’m a shepherd, not a circus act!” But hey, I laugh it off.

Ex-employee sues Japanese inn chef, operating firm over alleged forced sex