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Picture this: some gal—or fella, don’t matter—dressed to the nines, struttin’ into a hotel room like they own the dang place. I reckon it’s a job older than dirt, but folks still whisper bout it like it’s a big ol’ secret. Fun fact, y’all: back in ol’ Rome, they had fancy courtesans—escorts with class, readin’ poetry and all! Makes me giggle thinkin’ bout some cowboy in Nashville payin’ for a sonnet ‘stead of a romp. Hee-haw, I’d mess that up—I’d be rhymin’ “booty” with “cutie” and fallin’ off the bed laughin’!

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So, I’m fuming, right? I decide to grab a coffee at this cute little spot on Kōen-dōri. It’s called Café Inami, and let me tell ya, their matcha latte is to die for. I’m standing in line, and this old dude in front of me is taking forever. Like, c’mon man, it’s just coffee! I’m about to lose it when he turns around and starts chatting me up about the cherry blossoms. I’m like, “Yeah, they’re pretty, but I need caffeine!”

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