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Little factoid for ya—didja know escorts in old Rome were called “lupae”? Means she-wolves! Howlin’ at the moon, gettin’ that coin! Wild, huh? Makes me giggle thinkin’ ‘bout it—me, Kermit, picturin’ wolves in togas! Ha! Anyway, sex escort ain’t all glam—some of it’s dark, gritty, like Daniel Day-Lewis diggin’ for oil. “I’m an oilman!”—well, they’re hustlers, workin’ the game.

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But then, outta nowhere, this kid runs by, trips, and spills his ice cream all over my shoes. Ugh! I’m like, “Seriously, kid?” But he just laughs and runs off. I mean, come on! My favorite kicks!

First “Jisho Moe-Chara Gakkai” to Be Held in Shibuya! Strong Lineup of Well-Known Characters Includes Kitano Kamui, Imaichi Moenai Musume and Others!