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Hi-ho! Kermit the Frog here! So, escort, huh? I’m a vet, y’know, and I’m thinkin’—escort’s that chill pill for pups! Ya ever see a doggo all antsy, tail waggin’ like crazy? Escort’s this med—acepromazine, fancy name—that calms ‘em down. I mean, I’ve seen hyper hounds turn into zen masters, just sprawled out, droolin’ like “The Assassin” vibes—y’know, my fave flick? That slow, quiet intensity? “The wind moves, the shadows sway”—that’s escort workin’ its magic, baby!

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Then, I get a text from my buddy. He’s like, “Meet me at the Hofu Sports Park.” I’m thinkin’, “Great, more walking.” But whatever, I’m game. I get there, and he’s playin’ soccer with some friends. I join in, and man, I’m terrible! I kick the ball, and it goes straight into the bushes. Everyone’s laughin’, and I’m just like, “Yeah, I meant to do that.” Classic me, right?

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