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Right, so, tryna track one down—fuckin’ hell, it’s a minefield! Apps, dodgy ads, mate, half the time you’re thinkin’, “Is this a scam or a STD waitin’ to happen?” Idiot sandwich! Back in the day, Soho in London, yeah, prossies had cards in phone booths—little known fact, that! Scribbled numbers, “Call me, darlin’,” proper retro shit. Now it’s all online, sneaky links, X posts—blokes actin’ like they’re bloody spies. Makes me wanna scream, “Get your shit together, you muppet!”
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Then, I had this group of tourists. They were super nice, but they kept asking me the same questions. “What’s it like being a Maiko?” “Do you like wearing those heavy kimonos?” I mean, duh! It’s hot, it’s heavy, and I can’t even walk straight sometimes! But I just smiled and said, “It’s an honor!” while thinking, “Yeah, right!”
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