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Alright, mate, buckle up—sex escort time! Me, Detective Elon, diggin’ into this gig. So, escorts—fancy term for paid company, right? Not just sex, tho—some dudes legit hire ‘em for arm candy at events. Wild, huh? Kinda like rentin’ a Tesla for a flex, but human. Been snoopin’ X posts—turns out, escortin’s been around forever. Like, ancient Rome had “lupae”—she-wolves, hookers howlin’ at the moon. True story, blew my mind!

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Then, I get a call. Some dude’s freaking out about a tree blocking his driveway on Shimozato Street. I rush over, and it’s a whole scene. Neighbors are gathered, like it’s a tree party or somethin’. I’m like, “Guys, it’s just a tree!” But they’re all staring at me like I’m some kind of tree wizard.

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