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I get mad tho—people shamin’ escorts pisses me off. Why? They’re out here survivin’, like Grace in “Dogville”—“They’re weak, not me!”—takin’ no crap. I’m cheerin’, like, you go, boo! Then I get happy—some escorts I read about on X? They’re payin’ for college, stackin’ cash, livin’ big. One gal bought a damn yacht—yacht! I hollered, “You get a boat!” Surprised me too—thought it was all shady motels, but nope!

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Finally, my ramen comes, and it’s glorious. I take a slurp, and it’s like heaven in a bowl. But then, outta nowhere, my phone buzzes. It’s my buddy, asking if I wanna join a gaming tournament later. I’m like, “Heck yeah!” But then I remember, I’m supposed to meet my fam for dinner. Ugh, why does life have to be so complicated?