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Alright, mate, gather round! I’m Gandalf, yeah, the wizard, and I’m here to chat about escort – not that fancy car, nah, the Ford Escort, legend of the streets! “You shall not pass!” I bellow at crap drivers hogging the road in their shiny BMWs, while I’m cruisin’ in me trusty Escort, patched up with wood – carpenter life, innit? Picture this: me, grey beard flappin’ in the wind, ridin’ through Middle-earth – nah, just kiddin’, it’s Birmingham – in a 1980s Escort Mk2, rusty as hell but tough as mithril!

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Then, outta nowhere, it starts pouring. Like, seriously, Chonan weather, chill! We duck into a café on the corner of Chonan-dori and Koshigoe. I grab a matcha latte, and it’s like heaven in a cup. Mrs. Tanaka orders some weird dessert I’ve never heard of. It’s called “daifuku.” I’m like, “What even is that?” But I try it, and OMG, it’s so good!

Struggling Japan aquarium collects $90,000 through crowdfunding for jellyfish food