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So, I dig a lil—turns out, back in the day, prostitutes in Hong Kong—like Wong Kar-wai’s turf—had these wild secret codes. Hand signals, hairpins, the works. Sneaky af! Blew my mind. Imagine me, Edna, spotin’ that from my lifeguard tower— “No capes! And no damn hairpins neither!” I’d yell, splashin’ water at ‘em. Hilarious, right?

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First off, I hit the streets of Ageoshimo, and lemme tell ya, the vibe was off the charts. The sun was shining, but it was that weird, sticky heat. You know, the kind that makes you feel like you’re walking through soup? Ugh. I was cruising down Kōen-dōri, and I swear, the cherry blossoms were in full bloom. So pretty! But then, BAM! A pigeon poops on my shoulder. Like, really? Thanks, universe. Just what I needed.