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About Saitama

So, picture this—I’m frothin’ a latte, thinkin’ ‘bout this escort I heard of, workin’ downtown. Girl’s got sass, bills piled high, and a smirk that says, “I’ve seen it all.” Reminds me of Eilis sayin’, “You’ll feel so homesick you’ll wanna die,” but this gal ain’t got time for tears—she’s bookin’ clients faster’n I can steam milk. Makes me chuckle, ‘cause half these dudes payin’ her could buy a dang house, yet here they are, sneakin’ around like teenagers. How’s that workin’ for ya, fellas? Spendin’ a grand to feel like Tony from *Brooklyn*, all suave and secret?

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But then, I get a call. It’s my mom. She’s all worried about me. “Are you eating enough?” Classic mom move. I’m like, “Yeah, Mom, I’m fine!” But I realize I haven’t eaten since breakfast. Oops.

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