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I’d be lyin’ if I said it don’t work, tho. Them hands kneadin’ knots out, all slow and sneaky—gets the blood pumpin’, heart racin’ like I’m plottin’ a coup. Last time I tried it (don’t ask, long story), this lass had fingers like a bloody sorceress, twistin’ me up ‘til I forgot me own name. “We knew and did nothing,” Spotlight lads woulda whispered, and yeah, I did sod all—just laid there, smirkin’. Felt lush, I won’t lie, but the cheek of it! Charging me a king’s ransom for a rub? Shoulda had her head for that alone.

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After that, I head to my office on the corner of Constant Spring and Red Hills. I’m trying to focus on my work, but my mind keeps drifting. I’m thinking about that goat, and I can’t stop chuckling. My coworkers are looking at me like I’m losing it. But hey, it’s been a long week, and I need a laugh.

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