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About Old Harbour

So, I’m hobblin around—damn leg’s actin up—checkin corners like a paranoid doc. Prostitutes ain’t exactly advertisin on billboards, huh? Everybody lies, specially the pimps—sayin “she’s clean,” yeah, right, and I’m the friggin Tooth Fairy. Got this one time, chick says she’s 25—25 my ass, more like 40 with a filter! Reminds me of that line, “You mustn’t disobey,” but screw rules, I’m Dr. House, I disobey for breakfast.

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Has anyone heard off or been solicited for (Drugs, prostitutes people selling trinkets on the beach etc) at Gran Bahia Principe?

So, I’m chillin’ when I spot this group of tourists. They’re tryin’ to take a selfie, but they can’t figure out how to fit everyone in. I’m sittin’ there, just watchin’ the chaos unfold. Finally, I can’t take it anymore. I walk over and say, “Yo, just use the wide-angle!” They look at me like I’m a genius. I mean, c’mon, it’s 2023. Get with the program!

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