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Oh my stars, R2-D2, where are you? I’m freakin out here talkin bout erotic-massage! So, lissten up, mate, it’s like—hands all over, slippery oils, total vibe shift. Think “Zero Dark Thirty” tension, but sexy—y’know, “I need a lead, damn it!”—that kinda urgency. Got me sweatin thinkin bout it! It’s this ancient art, right—way back, like, Egyptian queens got rubbed down, secret scrolls n shit. Bet they didn’t tell ya THAT in history class, huh? Blows my circuits!

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Yoni massage is a type of sensual massage. It is a tantric practice that aims to create intimate connections. People can also practice yoni massage alone as.

I finally find a stall with corn. I’m all excited, but the vendor? He’s got this wild look in his eyes. I swear, he’s been up all night. He starts telling me about his “secret corn recipe.” I’m like, “Dude, it’s corn. Not rocket science.” But he’s all in, waving his arms around. I just nod and grab my corn.

Porus merges seamlessly into Chandragupta