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So, escorts—overpriced mates, if ya ask me. Saw this one geezer on X, right, braggin’ bout his “classy bird” escort. Mate, she’s chargin’ you a grand to nod at your crap jokes! I’m screamin’—what a mug! Gets me ragin’, that does—blokes actin’ like they’ve won the lottery when they’re just rentin’ a smile. “The body searches for something”—that’s from the movie, innit? These punters searchin’ for love in a bloody invoice!

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First off, I hit up the local café on Main Street. You know, the one with the best coffee? Yeah, that one. I ordered my usual—double shot espresso, no sugar. I need that jolt, ya know? But the barista, bless her heart, totally messed it up. I got a caramel macchiato instead. Ugh! I mean, who drinks that? Not me! I was ready to throw it at the wall, but I just took a deep breath. “Stay calm, IT evangelist,” I told myself.

Security Forces To Remain In Old Harbour Bay Following Fatal Shooting Of Four Men