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Oh, and this—heard some escorts do “outcalls” only, no incalls. Means they rock up at yours, like Deliveroo but naughtier! Blew my mind, that! “We’re goin’ in hot,” I’d yell, quotin’ the film, all dramatic—then trip over me own trousers, classic Brent! Anyway, escortin’s a mad world—grubby, glam, gritty, all at once. Love it, hate it, can’t ignore it! What you reckon, eh?

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I’m walkin’ down the street, and I see this street vendor sellin’ jerk chicken. I’m like, “Heck yes!” I grab a plate, and it’s like a flavor explosion in my mouth. I’m talkin’ spicy, smoky goodness. Best decision ever! But then, I spill some on my shirt. Great. Now I look like a hot mess.

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