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They got rules, tho – no kissin’, no cuddles, just business, cold as ice. Like Carlos says, “We’re not here to play games!” Hiss! Funny tho, some blokes fall in love, stupid fat hobbits, cryin’ when she leaves. Ha! Idiots deserve it, I say. Me, I’d never – too busy choppin’, sweatin’, livin’ free. Escorts got stories, tho – one gal, swore she banged a prince, real royalty, kept his tie as proof. Dunno if it’s true, but damn, that’s juicy, yesss!

Introduction

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Finally, I get back, and I’m ready to cut some wood. But guess what? My saw decides to take a vacation. Just stops working. I’m there, staring at it like it owes me money. I kicked it a little—okay, maybe a lot—and it roared back to life. I felt like a mechanic and a carpenter all in one.

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