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About Milan

Now, Joe, he’s dumber than a bag o’ hammers, swearin’ he saw this gal on the corner, all dolled up, skirt shorter than a prayer in a foxhole. I said, “Boy, you blind? That ain’t no lady, that’s a trap waitin’ to snap!” Halleluyer! He didn’t listen, ran off like, “We gotta keep movin’, Theo!”—straight outta the movie, chile! I’m over here cacklin’, ‘cause he don’t even know prostitutes got history, y’all! Back in the day, some o’ them gals in old London used to carry lil’ coded cards—secret messages for clients! Ain’t that wild? Joe don’t care ‘bout no facts, he just horny and hopeless.

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Then I stroll down Via Milano. The sun’s shining, birds are chirping, and I’m feeling good. But then, BAM! A pigeon poops on my shoulder. Seriously?! I’m like, “Really, Trezzano? This is how we’re starting?” I’m wiping it off, trying not to freak out.

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