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But real talk? It’s kinda dope too. People hookin’ up, chasin’ thrills—makes me happy seein’ ‘em try. Surprised me once—this shy guy, regular, scores a date off Bumble. Comes back glowin’, like he won the damn lottery. Made my night. Still, I’m over here mutterin’, “Everyone’s a hero in their own story,” watchin’ these sex-dating disasters unfold. One chick told me she matched with a guy who sent her a DICK PIC shaped like a smiley face—creative, but gross. I’d sentence him to a week of celibacy, bang the gavel!

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So, I’m walkin’, and I’m already late. I’m thinkin’, “Great, just what I need.” I turn down Via Cavour, and boom! There’s a street festival. Music blarin’, people dancin’, and I’m just tryin’ to get to work! I mean, c’mon, can’t a guy just get to his job without a parade? But then, I see this old dude bustin’ out some moves. I can’t help but laugh. He’s got more rhythm than I do, and I’m a carpenter!

Fig. 5. Somma-Vesuvius volcanic complex. The location of Trecase well...