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I was, like, “Girl, what’s your deal?” She’s choppin’ meat, blood everywhere, and I’m gaggin’ but also, like, into it? She goes, “I used to be somebody,” and I’m like, “Same, babe, same.” Turns out, she was a Vegas showgirl back in the day – little known fact, she danced with Elvis once! Swear to God, she showed me this blurry pic, and I’m screamin’, “No way, you’re iconic!”

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Finally, I get to the fields near the coast. The view? Breathtaking! The Mediterranean sparkles like a diamond. But then, I see it. A flat tire. Seriously? On a day like this? I’m cursing like a sailor. I mean, come on! I’m just tryin’ to plow some fields, not win a tire-changing contest.

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