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About Rome

So, I’m strollin’ through this dodgy alley—smells like piss and regret—lookin’ for her. Eyes sharp, suit crisp, cos even here, I’m the smoothest bastard around. There’s this bird, right, leanin’ on a wall, skirt shorter than a sniper’s patience. I’m like, “Oi, love, you workin’?” She smirks, all sassy, “Depends who’s askin’, handsome.” Cheeky minx! I’m chuffed—she’s got spirit, not just some dead-eyed doll.

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Then, I decide to grab some gelato at Gelateria La Dolce Vita. Best gelato in town, no cap. I get my usual—pistachio and stracciatella. I’m in heaven, right? But then, I see this old lady struggling with her groceries on Via San Giovanni. So, I’m like, “I gotta help her.” I drop my gelato (NOOO!) and rush over.

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