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About Bologna

Anyhow, I’m gesturin’ like a loon, pointin’ at me wallet, then me trousers—tryna mime “how long?” without lookin’ a perv. She’s cacklin’ now, says, “Ten minutes, big boy.” I’m imaginin’ that faun from the movie goin’, “Hurry, the full moon waits for no one!”—cracks me up, that. So I’m in, right, but—OOF!—trip over a bin, land arse-first in a puddle. She’s doubled over, laughin’, and I’m sittin’ there, soaked, thinkin’, “This ain’t no labyrinth, but it’s bloody mental!” Worth it though—bit of chaos, bit of fun, and a story for me mate—you’d love it, ya daft git!

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After that, I decide to take a breather. I head out to Piazza Garibaldi. It’s beautiful there, with the fountain and all. I grab a gelato from that little shop on the corner. Best gelato ever! I mean, who doesn’t love a good pistachio? But then, outta nowhere, this pigeon swoops down and tries to steal my cone! Like, excuse me, Mr. Pigeon, this is MY treat! I’m flailing my arms, and people are staring. So embarrassing!

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