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About Florence

Alright, listen up, ya filthy animals. I’m Ron Swanson, hate everything, ‘cept maybe a good steak. So, erotic-massage—yeah, it’s a thing. Some fancy-pants geisha vibe, all oiled up, makin’ ya feel like a damn king. I reckon it’s like Satine in *Moulin Rouge!*—all “spectacular, spectacular,” slidin’ around, promisin’ the moon. But lemme tell ya, it ain’t all roses. I tried it once—big mistake. Some chick with tiny hands, rubbin’ me down, whisperin’ sweet nothins. Made me madder’n a wet hen—too much touchin’, not enough whiskey.

Rooms and availability

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Roccella-Ionica is a gem, ya know? The kinda place that makes ya feel alive. The sun was shining, the sea was glistening, and I was like, “Today’s gonna be epic!” I hit up Via Nazionale first. It’s this busy street, full of shops and cafes. I needed caffeine, like, ASAP.

Migrant boat capsizes off Calabria coast, 50 missing