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Alright, so here’s the deal—erotic-massage, huh? I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’, what’s the big fuss? I mean, it’s hands, it’s oil, it’s… tension! Like in *The Master*, ya know, “Man is not an animal!”—but oh, we kinda are! Pretty, pretty good stuff, if you ask me. I get all fidgety just imaginin’ it—somebody’s rubbin’ ya down, and it’s supposed to be “relaxin’”? Gimme a break! I’d be sittin’ there, twitchin’, thinkin’, “Am I doin’ this right? Am I breathin’ too loud?” Total neurotic meltdown, classic Larry!

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Then, outta nowhere, this pigeon decides to play chicken with us. I’m yellin’, “Marco, brake!” But he swerves instead. We miss the pigeon, but hit a pothole. I’m bouncing around like a bobblehead. “Dude, you just scared the life outta me!” He laughs, thinks it’s hilarious. I’m like, “Yeah, well, I’m not ready to meet my maker today!”

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