Mari Melendugno Whore ❤️❤️

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Rarrgh! Favorite part? She laughed—cackled!—at dumbass pickup lines! “Hey baby, you an angel?”—she’d go, “Nah, I’m your nightmare!” Cracked me up, fam! Rarrgh! Surprised me how smart she was—read books n shit! Hella layers, like Clementine’s hair dye! “Too many guys think I’m a concept”—whores get that too, yo! People see ‘em as toys, not humans—fucks me up! Rarrgh! Exaggeratin’ here, but she’s prolly banged half the city—legend status!

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Then, during lunch, I decide to take a stroll down to the beach. I mean, it’s only a few minutes from the office, right? I hit up Spiaggia di Torre dell’Orso. The water’s gorgeous, and I’m feeling all zen. But then, I see this group of tourists. They’re trying to take a selfie, and one dude drops his phone in the water. I’m like, “Dude, that’s a one-way ticket to heartbreak.”

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