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The hands, Clarice… they glide, they press, they *know*. Like Béla Tarr’s long-ass shots, it drags on, builds somethin heavy. “What’s concealed is revealed,” like the movie says—every knot in my back? Gone. Every dirty thought? Amplified, ha! I’m lyin there, half-naked, oil drippin, and it’s funny—ya feel like a king and a perv at the same time. Pro tip: don’t go to them sketchy joints—neon signs screamin “massage”? Bullshit, that’s a trap. Find a real pro, someone who ain’t rushin ya out the door.

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We head over, and this guy is wild! He’s flipping and spinning, and the crowd’s going nuts. I’m laughing so hard, I almost forget about my pots. Almost. But then, I see a little girl in the front row, eyes wide, totally mesmerized. It hits me—this is what it’s all about.

‘It’s my spiritual sanctuary’