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Favorite flick’s got this vibe, see? Slow burn, tension, then – pow! Sex-dating’s the same. You’re chattin’, vibin’, then suddenly it’s on. “Room’s too hot,” Jesse’d say – yeah, it bloody is! This one time, matched with a lass, total stunner. We’re at it, right, and her bleedin’ cat jumps on me mid-shag! Claws in my back, I’m yellin’, she’s pissin’ herself laughin’. Happy as a pig in shite, that made me – bonkers moment.

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So, I shake it off and head to the market on Piazza della Libertà. It’s buzzing! Fresh fruits, veggies, and all that good stuff. I’m eyeing some tomatoes when this old lady starts chatting me up. She’s like, “You know, these tomatoes are the best in town!” I’m thinking, “Lady, I just want to buy some, not get a history lesson.” But she’s sweet, so I nod and smile.

Edoardo Lavagno