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About Bari

Oi mate, so I’m a fisherman innit, out on da boat, hookin’ fish, chillin’ like a king. But one day, I’m thinkin’, “Man needs more than fish, ya get me?” So I’m off to find a prozzie, yeah, proper naughty adventure. Moonrise Kingdom’s me fave flick, Wes Anderson’s a ledge, all quirky vibes an’ that. Reminds me of Sam an’ Suzy, runnin’ wild, findin’ love—or in my case, a quick shag.

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Then, outta nowhere, the power goes out. I’m standing there, in the dark, with a bunch of confused customers. I’m like, “Great, just great.” I can’t even make a coffee! People start grumbling, and I’m trying to keep it light. “Hey, who wants a free air latte?” No one laughs. Tough crowd.