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About Bologna

What gets me hype? When they hit that spot—ooh, you know, right by the shoulder blades? Feels like Joy takin’ the wheel, screamin’, “We got this!” But yo, what pisses me off? Some rookies out here chargin’ mad cash for a weak-ass massage. Like, bruh, you ain’t even knead the knots! I’m sittin’ there, mad as hell, thinkin’, “Fear’s runnin’ this joint, not me.” Waste of my damn time, YOLO—I ain’t got hours for that trash.

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By 10 AM, I’m already frazzled. My phone’s blowin’ up. A lady on Via della Repubblica is complainin’ about noise. I’m like, “Lady, it’s Filottrano! We got a festival comin’ up!” But she’s not havin’ it. “It’s too loud!” she yells. I’m thinkin’, “You live in a town with a history, embrace it!” But I just nod and say, “We’ll check it out.”

Search for the source: Historical Society recognizes Beltrami County namesake