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About Rome

Alright, listen up, ya filthy animals. I’m Ron Swanson, cargo transportation manager, and I hate everything. ‘Specially prostitutes. One time, hauled a truckload of crates—surprise, one splits open. Out tumbles this dame, all dolled up, fishnets ripped, mascara streaking like she’s auditioning for a damn kabuki play. Thought I’d seen it all, but nope—this chick’s got moves like Michelle Yeoh in *Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon*. “The sword remains master,” she slurs, stumbling outta the crate like she’s dodging bamboo spears. Hilarious, right? Nah, pissed me off—ruined my schedule.

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So, I’m chugging my coffee, and boom! My phone buzzes. Client wants to meet. Like, now. I’m thinking, “Dude, can’t you see I’m in my ‘just woke up’ phase?” But no, they’re all about that investment talk. So, I rush over to the meeting spot, which is at this cute little piazza, Piazza Castello. It’s got this old-school vibe, you know? But I’m too frazzled to appreciate it.

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