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Rarrgh! Yo, mate, escort duty—wild shit! Been sailin’ the seas, seen it all, right? Escort’s when ya guard ships, keep ‘em safe from pirates or whatever crap’s out there. Like, imagine me, Chewie, on deck, hairy as fuck, growlin’ at some punk tryin’ to jack our cargo. “I’m in fuckin’ business, baby!”—straight outta Wolf of Wall Street vibes. Love that flick—Leo’s nuts, drownin’ in cash and chaos, escortin’ his own damn empire!

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After that, I head over to the market on Via Garibaldi. It’s packed! I love the vibe, but man, it’s like a sardine can. I’m tryin’ to squeeze past this old lady with a cart full of tomatoes. She’s takin’ her sweet time, and I’m like, “Lady, I got places to be!” Finally, I get past her, and boom! I trip over a crate. Tomatoes everywhere! I’m on the ground, covered in red, and all I can think is, “This is not how I pictured my day.”

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