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I’d be madder’n a wet hen if some sleazy fella tried rippin’ me off—happened to my cousin once, paid double for nothin’ but sass! “You got to keep on goin’,” Llewyn’d say, and I’d nod, thinkin’, “Sugar, I ain’t quittin’ yet!” I’d sashay up, all Southern charm, askin’, “Hon, what’s the goin’ rate?”—prolly butcher the lingo, too, ‘cause I’m me, y’all!

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Then I decide to take a stroll down Via Dante. It’s a nice street, you know? Trees lining the road, cute little shops. I pop into this vintage store. I’m browsing, and I find this rad jacket. Totally my style. But guess what? It’s like 100 euros! I’m like, “Are you kidding me?” I mean, I love Casalpusterlengo, but I’m not made of money!

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