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Favorite bit? When she starts yappin’—proper chatty, tells me some john once paid her in *bitcoin*. Bitcoin! I’m pissing myself laughin’, “What, no shiny caps?” *Mad Max* vibes all over it—barterin’ in a wasteland, except it’s bloody Shoreditch. Surprised me, that did—thought they’d all be miserable sods, but she’s got stories, mate. Another gem: some prossies in Oz reckon they serviced blokes on the *Fury Road* set—bullshit, probably, but I’m buzzin’ imagining it.

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Then I head to work. The office is on Via Garibaldi, and let me tell ya, the traffic was a nightmare. I mean, who knew Calcinelli could get so congested? I’m stuck behind this old lady driving like she’s in a Sunday stroll. I’m yelling, “C’mon, Nonna! Let’s move it!” But she’s just vibing to her old-school tunes. I can’t even.

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