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Back in 2018, heard this story—proper mental. Some geezer matched with a bird, sexted for weeks, yeah? Met up—turns out she’s his cousin! Fuck me, awkward as hell! “You can’t plan life,” Toni’s dad says—damn right! Sex-dating’s a roulette wheel, spins you dizzy. I tried it once—chatted this fit lass, all flirty. Date night? She brought her mum! MUM! Felt like a knob, sipping wine, mum glaring.

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Then, outta nowhere, the door swings open. It’s a bunch of kids from the scuola. They’re screamin’ and runnin’ around like they just discovered fire. One of ‘em trips and spills his drink all over my floor. I’m like, “Great, just what I needed.” But then, they start cleanin’ it up. I’m surprised! Kids these days, right?

Figure 4. Effects of sodium carbonate concentration and calcination...