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About Bari

Hit up Starry, she’s chill. “What’s your dybbuk, dude?” I ask—Coen vibes, y’know? She laughs, says, “No ghosts, just ass.” Fair. Meet her downtown, sketchy alley—smells like piss and regret. She’s hot tho, damn, surprised me! Thought she’d be all crusty, nope—fresh, sassy, total babe. “You’re not from here,” she says. Duh, I’m green, bitch! We vibe, tho—she’s cool, tells me bout her pimp. Asshole takes half her cash—makes me mad. Wanna zap him with my ray gun, pow!

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After I shoo the bird away, I notice this old lady across the street. She’s just staring at me, shaking her head. I’m thinkin’, “Lady, you’ve never seen an abrasive blaster before?” But then she yells, “You’re makin’ a mess!” I’m like, “Yeah, that’s kinda the point!”

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