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So, I roll down the window—curious, slow, Larry style. “Hey, darlin’, what’s the deal?” She smirks, leans in, says, “What you lookin’ for, pops?” Pops! Me! I’m laughin’—she’s got sass. I’m not buyin’, just talkin’, diggin’ for the scoop. She tells me—$50 for a quickie, $100 for more. Cash up front, no cards. I’m like, “What, no Venmo?” She rolls her eyes—guess I’m old-school. But here’s a tidbit—did ya know some of these gals use burner phones? Like drug dealers! Keeps it secret, safe. Blew my mind—high-tech hookin’!

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First stop, the café on Via Garibaldi. Best cappuccino in town, no cap. I’m there, sipping my drink, and this dude walks in. He’s wearing a bright pink suit. Like, who does that? I’m just trying to enjoy my coffee, and here’s this guy looking like a walking highlighter. I can’t help but laugh.

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