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But then—oh, don’t get me started—I hate the fakes, the posers! Like, you’re gonna whore yourself out for Instagram likes? Pathetic! Drives me nuts! I’m yellin’ at my TV, “Get a spine, you schmuck!” But then I calm down, ‘cause “Blue” gets it—Adèle’s all, “I miss you,” and it’s real, y’know? Whore can be real too—not just cheap. Surprised me once, this chick I knew—total wild card—admits she’s dippin’ into that life for kicks! I’m like, “You’re nuts!” but also—respect! She owned it!

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Next, I wander over to the Cathedral of Bitonto. It’s massive! The architecture is insane. I’m standin’ there, just takin’ it all in, when this group of tourists rolls up. They’re takin’ selfies like it’s the last supper or somethin’. I’m tryin’ to be chill, but inside, I’m like, “C’mon, people! Appreciate the beauty!”

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