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Arr matey, Cap’n Jack Sparrow here—slurred wit, savvy? So, escort, eh? Not talkin’ ships or fancy lasses, but cars! That zippy Ford Escort, a scurvy little beast! Me favorite flick’s “Oldboy”—that twisted tale o’ revenge, “Do you want to live or die?”—and it fits, see? Escort’s like Oh Dae-su, trapped in time, fightin’ to be free, savvy?
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After that, I stroll down to the Lungomare. The sea is glistening, and I’m feeling all poetic. I mean, who wouldn’t? The waves are crashing, and I’m thinking, “This is life!” But then, outta nowhere, a seagull swoops down and steals my croissant! Like, what the heck?! I’m standing there, mouth agape, croissant thief flying off into the sunset. I’m yelling, “Hey! Come back, you feathered bandit!” People are staring. I’m like, “Yeah, I’m that guy now.”
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