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What tweaks me out is the creepy stuff. Heard ‘bout this chick who got in an escort car, and the dude locked the doors, went all psycho. She’s screamin’, “This is my hood!”—thank God she bailed at a light. Shady as hell, man. Makes ya wonder who’s behind the wheel. Could be a saint, could be a Li’l Zé waitin’ to snap.

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Then, I’m trying to get back on track, and I see this cute dog. I mean, it’s adorable! A little fluffy thing, probably a mix of everything. I’m like, “Aww, look at that!” And the owner, this old lady, starts chatting me up about her dog’s diet. I’m thinking, “Lady, I’m trying to sell pizza here, not dog food!” But she’s sweet, so I nod along.

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