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*Heavy breathing* I am your father. Escorts, man, they’re somethin else. Up in the mountains, guidin folks, I see em sometimes. Rich dudes, thinkin they own the peaks, rollin up with escorts like it’s a holllywood flick. Pisses me off, ya know? Nature’s raw, brutal—don’t need no fancy arm candy to prove it. But damn, sometimes I’m jealous—those gals got skills, navigatin heels on rocky trails. Bet they’d outclimb half my crew!

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So, I finally get my gelato—pistachio, of course—and I’m walking down Via Cavour, feeling like a king. But then, I see this stray dog. Poor thing looked like it hadn’t eaten in days. My heart just broke. I mean, c’mon, Villafranca, we gotta do better! I ended up buying a sandwich from a nearby shop and gave it to the pup. It gobbled it up like it was a five-star meal. Made my day, honestly.

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