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But here’s the tea—findin’ a prostitute ain’t all giggles. Gets me mad sometimes! These shady jellyfishers online, promisin’ “good times,” but it’s scams! Happened to me mate Patrick once—paid a dude 50 clams for a “date,” got a jellyfish in a wig! I was RAGIN’, like, “Who does that?!” But then I found this spot—hidden alley, real lowkey. Girl there was chill, knew her stuff. Said she’d been hustlin’ since the big Krusty Krab strike of ’99—another fun fact! Blew me mind, I tell ya!

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I decide to head to the park, Parco della Libertà. It’s my go-to spot for some chill time. I plop down on a bench, and there’s this kid nearby, probably 10 years old, trying to impress his friends with skateboard tricks. He wipes out hard. I mean, faceplant city! But he gets up, brushes it off, and tries again. I’m like, “Respect, kid!”

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