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Sarcasm time—oh yeah, *real* spiritual experience, totally not horny at all. Pfft. Truth is, it’s messy, awkward, fuckin’ glorious. Gets me all happy—then bam, guilt trips me. Like, am I a perv? Nah, just human. “Tonight’s the night,” I say again—prolly too loud. Lady giggles. Shit, she heard. Whatever, worth it. Try it, mate—don’t knock it ‘til ya do.

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Then I get to the market at Piazza della Libertà. Oh man, the smell of fresh bread and cheese hits me like a freight train. I’m drooling, right? But then, I see this guy trying to haggle over a piece of salami. Dude, it’s not a car! Just pay the price! I’m standing there, shaking my head, thinking, “Some people just don’t get it.”

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