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Here’s a lil somethin’ ya might not know—back in the ‘90s, ‘fore apps, folks did “speed datin’” for sex hookups. Five minutes, bam, you’re sizin’ ‘em up like Yubaba judgin’ workers! Weird, huh? Nowadays, it’s all pics and “wyd” texts at 2 a.m. I reckon it’s faster, but damn, half these profiles lie worse’n Kamaji with his coal pile. “6 foot, fit”—yeah, right, more like 5’5” and a beer gut!

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So, I finally get to my pigs. They’re all chillin’ in their pen, looking at me like, “Where’s our breakfast?” I’m like, “Chill, guys! I’m here!” But then, one of them, I swear, her name’s Gilda, decides to escape. She bolts right past me! I’m running after her down Via dei Fiori, yelling like a madman. “Gilda! Get back here!”

(PDF) "Archaeoastronomy in the Mausoleum of Hadrian – Castel Sant’Angelo, Rome" in 17° Seminario di Archeoastronomia dell’Associazione Ligure per lo Sviluppo degli Studi Archeoastronomici (ALSSA) Genova 28-29 march 2015 ENGLISH TRANSLATIO