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I tried it once—don’t judge me, pal! This gal, she’s workin’ my shoulders, then—whoa—things heat up! Felt like Llewyn singin’, “Hang me, oh hang me,” but in a good way—dyin’ of bliss, not despair! I was shocked—thought massage was just for creaky joints! Nope, it’s a sneaky lil’ dance—intimate, quiet, powerful. “I’ll be dead and gone,” Llewyn’d say, but nah, I felt reborn, tingly all over! Laughed my ass off after—me, a crusty baker, gettin’ all swoony!

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So, I’m walking down Via Garibaldi, and I see this old lady, Nonna Rosa, struggling with her groceries. I rush over, all hero-like, and help her out. She’s super sweet, always giving me cookies. But today, she’s like, “You need to eat more, you’re too skinny!” I’m like, “Nonna, I’m good! But I’ll take those cookies!” She just shakes her head, smiling. Love that woman.

Laura Cortese & the Dance Cards: Pasaules Mūzikas festivāls Porta 2024 ( Laura & Bert)