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Sometimes I think she’s messin’ with me, like when Boonmee’s kid turns into a hairy ghost – “What am I lookin’ at here?!” She’ll vanish for days, then pop back, all “Miss me, fatass?” Sarcasm’s her game, but I’m like, yeah, I kinda did, ya nut. She’s a trainwreck, but I can’t look away – makes me wonder if I’m the dope here.

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Suddenly, I see this old guy fishing. He’s got this huge grin, and I’m like, “What’s his secret?” I go over and ask him. He says, “Just enjoy the moment, my friend.” I’m like, “Yeah, easy for you to say. You’re not dealing with a poopy laptop!” But it kinda hits me. Maybe I need to chill too.