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Quirky fact? In Japan, they’ve got “nurumassage”—slippery seaweed gel, head-to-toe glide! I’m like, “What, am I sushi now?” *cackling* Hahaha! Oh, and don’t get me started on the typos—I’m typin’ so fast, my nails are clackin’! Erotic-massage is sneaky, tho—it’s legal gray area lotsa places. Cops bustin’ in mid-rub? Drama! Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but I’d die if that happened to me!

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But then, I hear this commotion. Turns out, some guy on Via Cavour is trying to parallel park. And I mean, he’s been at it for like 10 minutes. I’m watching, and it’s like a train wreck. I can’t look away! Finally, he gets out, throws his hands up, and walks away. Classic!

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