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But real talk, it ain’t all bad. Hella folks findin’ what they need—some quick fun, no strings, halleluyer! Little known fact, chile: back in the day, folks used newspaper ads for this! Called ‘em “lonely hearts”—ain’t that cute? Now it’s all “DTF” and “Netflix and chill.” I’m like, “Lord, these kids bold!” Surprised me how fast it flipped—makes me happy too, ‘cause ain’t nobody waitin’ by the mailbox no more.

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Then, outta nowhere, I hear this loud crash. I turn around, and some guy drops a whole crate of tomatoes. SPLAT! Red juice everywhere! I’m talking a tomato massacre. And guess what? The guy just stands there, frozen. I’m like, “Dude, it’s not a crime scene! Clean it up!” But nah, he just stares at the mess like it’s a Picasso painting or something.

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